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A Relationship Evolved (and Happy Birthday To My Ex)
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Today, June 29, is my ex-wife’s birthday. It still feels weird to say ex-wife. It felt weird to say fiancee, and it felt weird to say wife. I guess when you know someone as “something” for so long, it’s always weird to relabel them.
I didn’t realize until I opened up my notebook (the one that has the top half of all pages dyed blue due to water damage) that exactly one year ago, on her birthday, she told me that she wanted to take some time apart. I recounted that day in my narrative, And the Truth Shall Set You Free.
Of course, that time apart turned into the decision to remain apart, both of us coming to the conclusion that, while we still loved each other dearly, we weren’t meant to be together in that way. We’re on different continents and we’ve not had much in-person contact since that day one year ago.
Our individual paths took us in wildly differing directions, but over the past several months those paths have once again converged and we now walk together on a new one.
Our friendship is stronger than it’s ever been. My love for her has not lessened in any way, just evolved into something different. For some miraculous reason we’re able to open our hearts to each other, seeking support from one another, even when it involves romance with other people.
I won’t say it wasn’t a bit strange when we started to “go there” and talk to each other about our own personal romantic issues. But I can genuinely say that neither of us are bothered about it in the least; we just want each other to be happy.
This is an ode to my ex. For on her birthday last year, she gave herself a huge gift by making what will probably be one of the hardest decisions in her life. A decision that started her on a new path to happiness. At the same time, she also gave me a gift, even though at the time it certainly didn’t feel like it. She liberated us both from a relationship that clearly wasn’t working and as a result we are both at the happiest points in our lives.
People ask me all the time about regret. Do I regret anything about our time together? Do I feel like there was wasted time? My firm conviction is no. She taught me so much about life and love and there is no way that I would be in the position that I am now in without her. She took me away from a life that I was not really happy in. Who knows what would have become of me had I not met her, but I’d be willing to bet that I would have stayed in my comfortable, yet unhappy, position. In other words, she gave me a new life.
Happy Birthday to you. Love, peace, and happiness.