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Attack of The Killer Ex
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A long time ago, I used to live in a small town in Quebec where you didn’t need free dating sites to find someone to date. I was new to the town and because I didn’t speak French, it was hard to make friends and more importantly, acquaint myself with the hot stuck up French girls. It was during this period where I met this an Anglophone girl who actually liked me. The truth was I wasn’t immediately attracted to her and the fact that everybody in town told me she was an outcast, didn’t help matters. However, when I started to get to know her better, I realized that we were both alike and because of that I “fell” for her.
Unfortunately, after two years with her, I realized we were incompatible and I moved back to Toronto shortly afterwards. At the time, I felt liberated and free. She was a very jealous person and always fought girls who blinked in my direction. When I moved back to Toronto, I finally started living the way a guy in his early twenties should live. I partied with my friends and met a lot of hookups at bars and dating personals. Despite the fact that I was having fun, I also felt pangs of loneliness. I felt like I missed the girl I left in Quebec. I was too young to realize at the time that I just couldn’t handle being alone and that was my biggest mistake in life because after that, I convinced her to move to Toronto to live with me.
She had a hard time making friends and because of that she adopted my family and friends as her own. Things were great at first, but then the same old problems reared their ugly faces and this time I was trapped. I couldn’t leave. She left everything to be with me. I was stuck with her better and for worse. For three years, I lived in misery. She nagged, she gained tons of weight and never wanted to go out anywhere and she never wanted me to hang out with my friends. I ignored my goals in life to take care of her. She had no aspirations besides becoming a housewife and that frightened me to no end.
During the last year of our sham of a relationship, I met an awesome girl who I fell head over heels for. She actually paid attention to everything I talked about and genuinely found me interesting. It was then I realized that my happiness did matter in life. I couldn’t sacrifice another moment of my life with a woman who resented me as much as I resented her. So, I left my girlfriend. She freaked out, punched herself in the face and threatened to tell the cops that I beat her. I told her she could take everything we owned together and she did. I gave up all my possessions I had paid for besides my leather chair just to get her out of my life. I thought at the time I was finally free.
When I was in my new relationship, everything was great at first. That was until my ex had moved in with my sisters right around the corner from my current girlfriend. My ex was still trying to make my life a living hell and she succeeded because she eventually turned my whole family against me. My new girlfriend didn’t care for this, but she put up with it because she loved me and I loved her more than I had loved anyone else in this world. We put up with police reports, changing our phone numbers and even moving away just to avoid my ex. I thought our problems were finally over, but they weren’t.
Again, I was too young to realize that jumping into a relationship after a bad relationship was a bad idea in the long run. I had no clue how to be in a healthy relationship and because of that, I actually turned into my ex. I became jealous and possessive with my new girlfriend. I constantly accused her of cheating on me because I was so scared of losing her. She was the only thing in my life I cared about and honestly, she was the only person who I felt at the time cared for me.
She eventually left me and told me it had nothing to do with my psycho ex, but rather it had to do with the fact that I needed to grow up. I was devastated. Of course, I had blamed my ex for my relationship failure. I couldn’t take responsibility for the deterioration for my relationship. I couldn’t admit that my past toxic relationship has stunted my growth process.
I finally did something I needed to do: I experienced being single for the first time in my life. It wasn’t great at first. In fact, I was depressed for months because my heart was broken, but it was something I needed and I’m glad to say that I have detoxed the toxins from my previous relationships.
My psycho ex still calls me. My family still avoids me because of it, but honestly I couldn’t be happier with my life right now. I have a good head on my shoulders now and I am actually starting to talk to my last girlfriend again. One thing that never changed was that I never fell out of love with her and hopefully with time, I can prove that I am the man she wanted and needed years ago.